just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
