You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
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