are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
