By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize