I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
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Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
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i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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