They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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