I wanna bring you to show and tell
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
