He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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