Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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