it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
