She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize