Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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