I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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