OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
