Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Randomize
