just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
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