I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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