If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
i would one night stand the shit outta him
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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