Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize