You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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