i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
