He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
People in love make me want to vomit
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize