Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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