I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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