What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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