I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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