you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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