I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize