No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize