i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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