Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
