no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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