Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
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