Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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