drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
