I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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