As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
