Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
