Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
