If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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