Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
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you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
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Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
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