you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
