dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
