do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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