Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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