it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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