I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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