Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
