never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
