im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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